Two Old Bats in the Belfry
Two Old Bats in the Belfry
Quirky Careers
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But the fun doesn't stop there. We dive into the hilarity and madness of choosing between competence and appearance while hiring a receptionist during the bustling tax season. This chapter is packed with chaos, a valuable lesson on priorities, and some whimsical dream job fantasies like being a fluffer or a merkin maker. With our entertaining anecdotes and heartwarming moments, we remind you that age is just a number, and the unpredictability of life can bring endless joy. Tune in and let our stories of quirky jobs and unexpected turns brighten your day.
Hi everyone, this is Shelley G and Vicki Z, and we are Two Old Bats in the Belfry.
Speaker 2I don't know about you, vic, but I know that I have been working since I'm like the year of the flood, since I was very, very young and I'm sure you were too and we come from a generation of very hardworking people with a very strong work ethic and moral compass. And moral compass, yes, and I know that with the myriad of jobs that I have had, that there are always some interesting incidents that happen at these jobs. For example, I was working temp once in Manhattan. Example I was working temp once in Manhattan. I was working for a petroleum company and I went out for a late lunch. It was on 2nd Avenue, right Very close to the United Nations and the streets. It was after lunch and the streets were kind of a little empty. And as I'm walking, a bum, an actual bum, rolls out from the doorway and right into me and he says you want to screw for a cigarette? And I was very indignant. I mean I said to him I don't smoke. And then I said to myself.
Speaker 2He's a stupid idiot and I ran away. He looked at me like what the hell and I ran away. He looked at me like what the hell.
Speaker 1I think that's fabulous it was I really do.
Speaker 1Yes, I, yeah, I. I've had a couple of things happen. I was in dental assisting school. My first job was actually selling water, ice and soft pretzels and, being from Philly, those soft pretzels were out of this world. So I have a feeling that over that summer I gained more weight and ate more water, ice and pretzels than I ever sold. Um, I was a. That's why I couldn't make it in a bakery that right. I mean, I don't know how people work in bakeries. I did ask that of someone once and she said oh, you kind of get used to it.
Speaker 1I don't think I would not when I can eat a sleeve of Oreos, right, no, and. I can eat like a half a dozen donuts without any problem.
Speaker 1I was working as a dental assistant trainee and it was an internship in a hospital and I was given the task of developing a set of x-rays and, unfortunately for me, I got so excited about doing a good job that I only did the developing of the linings of the x-ray. These were old day x-rays where they had three inserts in a little packet and you had to take out the linings and just develop the x-ray. Well, I developed the linings and nothing came up.
Speaker 2I guess the dentist wasn't very happy, was he?
Speaker 1Wasn't happy at all. I don't even think he laughed, but a lot of other people did. And then I went on to bigger and better things. And what was your next experience?
Speaker 2Well, when I was 17, I got a job in a local hospital. It was a very small hospital in New York and it really only catered to not very threatening illnesses or sicknesses. You know, if you had a hangnail or you had, a lot of the men came in for earplugs and I worked in the next to the morgue. As a matter of fact, my girlfriend managed a lab right next to the emergency room, so whenever anything funky went on, she would call me Shelly come on up, come on up.
Speaker 2You got to see this guy with a Coke bottle up his butt or you know something like that. We saw the funniest things. As a matter of fact, we used to eat our lunch in the morgue. We used to eat our lunch in the morgue and sometimes there would be a body on there oh no, with an organ that was not to be believed. And she would say to me would you take a look at that that's? I mean, that's dead, that's not even alive. Can you imagine that organ when it's erect? So we used to have all kinds of crazy things, but I did see. Martin Landau came in.
Speaker 2His father was a patient, so he came in he was married to Barbara Bain and you know that was a whole big excitement in the hospital. Do you remember the comedian Norm Crosby? Oh, of course His brother, jason, came in for hair plugs.
Speaker 1Oh, my God, and I was in charge of. I was young Were you in charge of the plugs.
Speaker 2Well, I did date him. He lived in Massachusetts.
Speaker 1Really, oh my God, he was a riot.
Speaker 2But his brother was even funnier, really. Yeah, he didn't behave the way Norm Crosby did, but his brother owned a factory that made leather suits, oh my. So he, as a final parting gift, he sent me a white leather suit. That's very nice, yes, which at that time.
Speaker 1Now you're going back 40 years, 50 years Must have been gorgeous yes, retailed for $450 in Lord Taylor. That would be about several thousand dollars today, I'm sure.
Speaker 2But the hospital. I worked at the hospital for 10 years. We had a lot of funny. The. The christmas parties were just like you see on tv, with ivy bottles of right hospitals are a great source of everything oh my god, I mean.
Speaker 1the things that go on there are truly, truly, truly remarkable. It is true, I went to school for doing nails when I was 45. And I was the oldest person in class.
Speaker 2Everybody else was in high school.
Speaker 1And I remember after graduating we also did some training, obviously, and there was a woman who came in who we were going to do gels on and I accidentally glued her to the table.
Speaker 2And when she didn't work there much longer.
Speaker 1Well, it was my school training, but I never had a better experience than that. Everybody was on the floor laughing and another guy, a very old, old man, came in for a pedicure and when they took his socks and shoes off, his feet were blue. And I said to the administrator I, I said I'm not touching those feet unless a doctor's note accompanies, and thankfully I didn't have to do it.
Speaker 1But wow, I ended up when I did that as a as a line of work. Um, I came across one particular girl I'll remember wanted a manicure and pedicure. Her nails were painted black and they were sharpened to a point like a cat's claw and her feet.
Speaker 1Her nails on her feet, on her toenails, were the same and that's the way she wanted to keep them. I wasn't sure whether she was using them as a weapon in lovemaking or the name of this podcast is not disgusting. Nail story I know, but that isn't that awful how anybody.
Speaker 2And she also had a very large tattoo on her neck of an eye, like an evil eye, which I think is for protection, but this one was exceptionally large you know, when you were taking the classes and you were the oldest one there, you, you should have said to the class you should have said I look good for 18, don't I? I know really I should have. That would have been good. Well, when I was young, I went to work. I was in my 20s, I think.
Unconventional Dream Jobs
Speaker 2I went to work for one of the big eight CPA firms in Manhattan. I worked for the partner in charge of tax and all of the accountants were young guys and I got along really nicely with them. But I remember once we needed to hire a receptionist and the choice was between a very competent middle-aged woman or this really young woman with the biggest boobs that these accountants had ever seen, and they begged me to hire her, even though she really had no skills. She was adorable, but she had no skills. So I said you know what, screw them, I'm going to hire them Now. I hired her and tax season came and tax season was really a crazy time.
Speaker 2I'm sure it is. Yes, it really a crazy time.
Speaker 1I'm sure it is For all of us.
Speaker 2It's a crazy time, yes, and I remember the guys were going crazy because they couldn't get any work out of her and I said I took a step back and I said well, this is what you wanted. You wanted a pretty face, and that's what you got. They begged me to fire her and bring back somebody that was competent which I ultimately had to do.
Speaker 1Did you make them suffer first? Oh boy, did I. I hope so, because they get what they deserve. That's right See.
Speaker 2So now, if you had a choice, what would your preferred job, dream job, be?
Speaker 1You know, after all is said and done, I think what would be unusual and fun would be working as a fluffer.
Speaker 2Well, in that vein, I would love to be a merkin maker, and anybody who is listening to this podcast who doesn't know what that is, ask your parents, absolutely. They'll know and we'll leave you with this.
Speaker 1Who doesn't know what that is? Ask your parents, absolutely, they'll know and we'll leave you with this.
Speaker 2Remember age is mind over matter.
Speaker 1If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.